As I said before – good, creative story. Porn Ignore jerk comments. You left some great possibilities open for a second chapter. grammar was atrocious. Please follow up with another story. Second, please don’t leave us wondering what the two girls in the bathroom were up to. I note that the commenter didn’t refer us to any works of his/her own. Thanks for committing your time and effort to the art of writing and keep writing!anonymous readerReport 2013-09-28 20:38:55Yeah, maybe actually finish primary school before attempting to write.anonymous readerReport 2013-09-28 20:18:57Very good story! You left some great possibilities open for a second chapter. Words were very strange, like using “defiant” instead of “definite” over and over implying it’s not merely a spelling error but some confusion on your part.
