You kept switching between past-tense and present-tense and most sentences weren’t correctly punctuated. Your grammar and punctuation could definitely use some work, though. Porn You should write more chapters. 17 comments«1234»Douglas WiseReport 2021-09-19 20:15:44love it so far very hot looking forward to the next chapterbuggy69Report 2020-11-08 12:35:25superb story. Your grammar and punctuation could definitely use some work, though. 17 comments«1234»Douglas WiseReport 2021-09-19 20:15:44love it so far very hot looking forward to the next chapterbuggy69Report 2020-11-08 12:35:25superb story. Your grammar and punctuation could definitely use some work, though. 17 comments«1234»Douglas WiseReport 2021-09-19 20:15:44love it so far very hot looking forward to the next chapterbuggy69Report 2020-11-08 12:35:25superb story. I suggest having someone you know has proper grammar and punctuation proof-read it, but if you aren’t down for that, have someone teach you with a different text or look up
